1 week to go

I'm finally almost done with this part of the journey. We have 9 days to go before I'm on a plane to go see my amazing husband. Keira and I can't wait to see him. I have been writing him everyday and even though I only get letters once a week, it has been what's got me through it. The phone calls are definitely amazing but there hasn't been many of them. He was able to call a week ago at his Papa Dave's service and it was perfect timing to hear from him. They were suppose to get a phone call the night before but got into trouble. Blake thought that meant no phone calls at all but his RDC's surprised them at let them call the next day. It was so good to hear his voice and be able to ask him questions and get answers right then and there. The waiting game when you have question that needs to be answered sucks. Last I heard from him, he was contemplating taking a leadership role but from what I can tell he didn't end up doing it. He is counting the days till graduation and now they are waiting for there final test to sum up there whole experience there at boot camp. Battle stations!!! He doesn't know when it is coming but it will happen this week. For those of you who don't know what Battle stations is, it is there final test in boot camp where they actually go on a set that is built to look like a real ship. They are tested on everything the have learned through boot camp and it is a long process. It is to prepare them for some of the worst things that could go wrong out at sea. When everything is said and done they get to line up and replace the recruit caps with sailor caps. Which obviously means he did it!! After that he gets to call home to tell us he did it. I can't wait to here the pride and excitement in his voice during that phone call. Then all that is left is practicing for boot camp graduation. Blake is actually working during the graduation and greeting all the top brass. He was nervous about it at first but now is more confident about it. He just can't wait to be done with this part and move onto schooling. It will definitely be easier with more ways to communicate now. We are still tossing the idea around on whether or not Keira and I will move out to be with him, but for now I want him to do school for a month and see how everything works out. He needs to get his feet wet and really get use to the new schedule that school is going to bring. I know that right now he wants us to move out there because he hasn't seen us in almost 8 weeks. I tell him in my letters all the time that he needs to see that it isn't easy for me to tell him to wait a month. I would love to drop everything and move to where he is but right now it doesn't seem like the best option. We will see how life is in the next month. For right now we are just looking forward to graduation. I don't know how I'm going to sleep the night before the ceremony. I know the the night before the flight i will get some sleep, but the night before graduation it isn't going to happen. I'm going to have so many emotions running through me that I won't be able to calm down enough to sleep. lol.  I just can't wait to be in his arms again and I also can't wait to see Keira reunite with her daddy again. I'm going to need some amazing waterproof eye makeup because as soon as I see him during graduation I'm going to be a mess. Okay Im done rambling for now but I will update again after his graduation.

Half way there!!

So as of Tuesday we will be 4 weeks in and only 4 weeks to go until I get to see my amazing husband. It has definitely been a challenge on my own sometimes and to add to it I have a very busy 4 year old. Keira has been as good as we could expect. She definitely has had her moments of acting out because daddy is not here. There have been points where even mommy has put herself on time outs because I need a second to re group and figure out how I'm going to deal with certain situations. Right now she is testing me because she thinks that maybe if she is bad that daddy will come home. At one point when she was in middle of getting in trouble she looked at me and said," fine then just call daddy!" Then it all clicked. She thought maybe breaking the rules and doing something bad would finally drive me to the point of calling Blake and making him come home. Poor thing. She is a total daddy's girl so I expected her to act out, but she has definitely put me through the ringer. We are finally coming out of it and she is starting to get back to normal. No more ignoring me, she is cleaning her room, and we are still working on the not telling me no, but it is coming a long.
Now back to Blake. I have gotten 4 letters and phone call that lasted 20 minutes. Best 20 minutes of my whole week. When I answered the phone and heard him say hi babe, i could have passed out with excitement. Thank god I didn't, but i was definitely not expecting a phone call a day after getting 4 letters from him. He was really emotional and cried when he talked to Keira. We talked about everything that came to mind. Cracking jokes and talking about our letters. It was good to hear him laugh but he would start to get choked up just by me talking. He said it was because he missed me so much that just the sound of my voice made everything just a little bit more bearable. As I was talking to him Blake knew something was up. He knew that I was definitely trying not to cry while I was on the phone with him, but he said he could to tell in my voice something was really bothering me more then the stresses of daily life without him. That morning some lady claimed she was attacked by a guy who pushed through her door when she answered it. He jumped on top of her and try to assault her. This happened in our apartment complex not far from mine. It turned out it was all a hoax, but for those few hours I was really freaked out. And of course Blake calls on the same day. He told me know matter how bad it was he wanted to hear it. All of a sudden I bursted into tears and told him everything. Normally I would be a little scared about something like this because Blake was always home but since I'm by myself it really freaked me out. When I was done I started apologizing and all he said was," it is fine babe, you were scared and if i can be here for you in any way I want to." God I love that man! He is going through hell right now and he still feels the need to put me first. After that he talked to Keira before he had to go and she reminded him that we are coming to see him and when we get there he has to fix mommy's heart. He started to cry again and I got the biggest lump in my throat. She kept telling him it was okay and that she loved him. Then it was my turn to say goodbye. We said I love you and I promised I would continue writing him everyday. Then we said goodbye and it was over. I wanted to be happy but then part of me wanted to cry. I miss him soo much. I shed a few tears and then pulled myself together so I could continue with my day. His letters are a really nice thing to have. When I miss him I will read one to make myself feel better. He wrote that he appreciated all the letters he has gotten from me, his mom, ryan and loralyn, and nana. Blake says the food isn't bad at all and he is even spoiled with Philly cheese steak and pizza. The physical training sucks but he is getting really skinny and is going to be in amazing shape. He prays for his family every night and especially for Nana and Papa Dave. He wishes he could be home to be there with them and just give Nana a great big hug and tell her and Papa how much he loves them. The time has given him a lot of time to think about things and how much he appreciates and loves his family. He has noticed somethings he can change and plans on fixing them when he gets home. Blake also said he cant wait to see his family that is coming to see him graduate. He is really happy to hear that is brother is going to be coming to see him and he is counting the days until he is done. He is in a special division and they are doing well. There are 4 other 28 year olds so he isn't the old one and he is making a lot of friends, even if more then half of them are 10 years younger. I can't wait for his next letter and cant believe we have already made it half way. I am that much closer to seeing my amazing husband! That's it for now I will try and update this in 2 weeks and then again after I get to see him.